Only 1 trip for us!!

Well, it's official, today we were told that our paperwork has been submitted and that we have beat the deadline of May 9th !! We are only going to have to travel one time! There are two people in particular that have been absolutely amazing to work with from CWA....Emily B. and Michael A. !  Whether they are giving

us good news or bad, they have always given it to us in such a thorough, detailed and prompt manner!  I have to give a "shout out" to them of praise, because they have really come through for us in times of stress and confusion.  I am SO very thankful to have them behind us in this process!

So we are told that we should receive a court date within 4 weeks, and then if everything goes well with that, we will be traveling within 8 weeks from that passed court date.  This can change of course, give or take a few weeks or so....nothing is set in stone with this we are seeing.  We are hopeful now to travel in June! 

We also found out why our son was moved to the city early....without going into all the details, basically it was to make room for many orphans that needed a place to stay in Soddo.  They chose some of the children whose families were furthest along in the adoption process and decided to move them early.

I am so excited to start working on another letter, and get some more pictures together to send to him while he is waiting these next couple of months. 

I am thanking God for all that He has taught us and is teaching us with every step in this process. I am excited to see what He has for us next!

Texas and Addis!

I woke up at 4:56 am Texas time this morning.....my body is telling me that it is 5:56 am.....this is normal wake up time for me in Pennsylvania.  I tried to go back to sleep, but too many things are swarming through my mind.  I am having such a great time with my family here in Texas!  My new nephew is ADORABLE and I can't get enough of him!  I am so thankful that we were able to take this trip.  My sister-in-law Marie is such an amazing Mommy and my little brother...well, I just can't believe that he is a Daddy now...and a good one at that.  When my brother Jon holds Samuel or talks to him, a calmness comes over him, he is just still and waiting to see what his daddy is going to say or do next...it is really sweet. 

  This has been a good time....we head home on Tuesday, which will be bittersweet.  I will be so sad to leave my family here, but I am excited to get back as we anticipate the weeks ahead. Yesterday morning, Mike was upstairs checking emails while Isaac and I were having breakfast with Miss Joanne, and he yelled down..."Becky and Isaac, come up here!!!"  I knew it must have had something to do with the adoption and our son, because of the excitement in his voice.  That indeed is what it was!  Apparantly we received an email late in the evening on Friday with photos of our son in Addis.  They moved him to the city already!  We were so shocked, because we didn't think that this would happen until after our court hearing had taken place.  We don't even have a court date yet.....

Anyway, the photos were fun....he was kicking a ball, doing a handstand, posing for the camera.....he looked so happy and so handsome!  I hope that all is well with him....this move has been something we have been worried about for him.  We have no idea if he has ever been in a car, or to the city....and they have now moved him away from the place where he has had consistency and friends and security for a little over a year now.  We are really hoping that this move means that our case is on the move and we will be traveling sooner than we thought!  Time will tell....

I think that I will send him another photo album and another letter....this may be something fun for him to recieve while he waits and wonders.

I feel like my little nephew now, as he is still and waits to hear what his daddy is going to say or do next.......Psalm 46:10 keeps going through my mind again...."Be still and know that I am God"  I am waiting with ears and eyes open wide to see what my heavenly father has in store for us next....Knowing that He is in control brings such a peace and contentment over my heart.

Tom's Shoes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kt3BQQ6dQaQ&feature=PlayList&p=5E96CC88E07BCD1B&index=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bexL5qaHJPA
Please take a look at these short video clips!
Ok, so I am sure this guy is making a ton of money, but it is so cool to see that someone is actually helping all these people in the world with what he has developed!  This is the pair I hope to purchase before we travel to Ethiopia...to keep my feet nice and safe, and to help another child in need at the same time!

Well, there are some things "in the works" for our case right now....I feel that I should wait to post specifics until more is clear.  Basically, we still don't know for SURE what is going to happen next....and I truly am ok with this now.  I am so much more at peace about it all then I was before.  I just want to do whatever needs to be done and just get him home!  I just keep trying to remember, that no matter what, he WILL be home this summer and part of our family! We received an update today and new photos of him!  I was SO excited!  I have been stalking my email inbox for these photos for weeks now, knowing that they could come any day during the month.  He gets more handsome each month and in the pictures he had the brightest, happiest smile that I have seen yet!  These photos definetely will help carry me through the next several weeks of waiting!  I feel so thankful and fortunate to receive these regular updates!  Thank you Soddo staff!!!!!.....a good friend of mine is adopting from China and she just sits and wonders and just prays for her little guy.  She hasn't received ANY updates and I can't imagine how that must feel!  I am aching just to reach the next update each month...she has to wait until she actually sees him for the first time in person....My heart goes out to her and I just have to pray for her.  This waiting and wondering for all of us is so much harder than I thought it would be. 

Still NO news.....

Well, it has officially passed the time now when I would have heard anything if there were new news today.  They leave the office at 4:30 and it is now 6:30......I tried to stay busy today and not dwell on it....I need to do the same thing tonight.  So that is enough about that...ha
I had a really good day at home today.....I love when it is a rainy day and we have nowhere to go.....we just  enjoyed a cozy day together!  We had school, played some games, watched "Growing Pains",  I did some cleaning, and then I made cookies and dinner while Isaac made a fort that he was very proud of!  He spent

about 1 hour making alterations and changing it to make it just perfect.....then my parent's dogs (who we are watching while they are away) jumped on it ,and it came crashing down.  Poor Isaac....he took it pretty well though.

This was taken right before she jumped! ha

I got Mike's approval on the cookies....he likes them!  He is the "cookie monster" in this house and the one that I TRY to keep the cookie jar filled for. He loves his cookies and milk at night....It is the least I can do for him for all the hard work he does for our family!  This is the first time I have made this recipe, but it is out of one of my favorite books..."Martha Stewart's Cookies".  I made the oatmeal raisin, but I used chocolate chips instead of raisins, and I used ground flax seed instead of wheat germ.

Trying to learn some Amharic

This is one of the books that I recommended on my first post.  I was reading over and practicing some of the words and phrases this morning, and I thought it might be fun to share a few on here that I have learned.
I love you so much!~ Beht-AHM ehn-wuh-dih-HAH-loh!

We are so happy to be your family!~ Yeh-GNAH beh-teh-SEHB ah-BAHL beh-meh-HOH-neh des bloh gnal!

Good job!~ Tih-ROO sih-RAH!

Let's play!~ Eh-NICH-ah-wuht!

Are you O.K.? ~ Teh-SHAH-lekh?

I hope that when we get there and I actually see my son face to face, I won't be too nervous or excited to even remember any of these things I have been practicing for months now!  ha ha

I am praying that this day brings an update on our adoption process!  I will post more later!

What a great day!

I am so happy to report that at the present time it seems as if Ethiopia has changed the deadline for the new ruling to take affect.  As always, things can change, but for right now it is April 9th.  We are hoping that our paperwork is submitted to the courts before this date!  I had a wonderful conversation with our dossier case manager today....he made me feel so much better and cleared many things up that I had questions about.  It was a much needed contact and conversation that left me feeling "satisfied" (for the moment..ha ha) in these days of "waiting".  I was warned, but didn't realize how hard all of this waiting would actually be.  You just feel like you want to hear something, anything, each week.  You are so busy doing paperwork and getting through all the appointments in the beginning, and then when you have it all done you just wait.  It takes some adjustment !

I also had a great evening ! My sister-in-law Christine (Mike's sister) had a small get-together tonight in honor of  "H's" soon homecoming!  I was once again overwhelmed with the love that was shown to us and to our son.  I am so thankful for such amazing family and friends that are truly sharing in the joy with us!  I wish that I could post all the pictures, but "H's" photo is in most of the pictures,(we had them sitting around for everyone to see) and until we pass court, we aren't allowed to make his name or photo "public".  The day is coming soon, when he will officially be our son and I can share his handsome little face with all of you!  Thank you to my family and friends for such a wonderful night it was so much fun!  I love you all very much!

Is it just rumor or truth?

The latest "buzz" on the internet last night was that Ethiopia has changed their minds about how soon this new ruling will take effect.  We didn't hear from our case manager yesterday and we assumed that this meant that there were no changes.  We later found out that she was out of the office for the day, and now we are hoping that THIS is the reason why we did not hear anything yesterday.  We are hoping and praying that the rumors we read are true, and that things will continue as planned for our family. 
I was praying about all of this off and on all day yesterday....I mostly just prayed for peace for Mike and I .  I am not devastated with the fact of having to travel twice and I am not horribly worried that God will not provide the money to do so....well, at least this is what my brain is telling me.....my heart must not be quite "there" yet, because I still feel somewhat anxious....so I am praying for the peace that can't be obtained by our own efforts....only He can provide this. It is probably the "unknown" that is causing these feelings more than anything else, oh and my human nature and I guess my lack of faith....that is hard to admit, but it must be true....because if I had total faith, then I wouldn't be worried at all.  It reminds me of Peter walking across the water to meet Jesus and how he took his eyes off Him and looked at the storm around him, got scared and began to sink.  I get so frustrated when I realize that my human nature has kicked in and I start to "sink". 
This morning I was reading in Galatians 3 and reading Oswald Chamber's comments on this passage. He was talking about continuing to walk by faith even when God has removed all the "visual symbols" from our path.  We have had so many "visual symbols" throughout this adoption process.  God has shown us clearly over and over again that He is in the middle of this and has given us the gift of so many exciting tangible experiences.  It is so much easier to walk by sight but my desire is to truly, in all things, walk with him by faith!
Hopefully today will provide an answer to all our questions.....

Going to Ethiopia 2 times now?!!?

I won't go into great detail about the reasons why, but we just got word today, that Ethiopia has now made the new rule that adoptive parents must show up at court instead of someone representing us there.  This means that parents have to travel 2 times!  I know this is the standard procedure for many countries, but this is brand new for Ethiopia.  We heard rumors of this several weeks ago, and hoped and prayed that it would not be the case.....but as of today, they are saying that if our paperwork has not yet been submitted to the courts in Ethiopia than this rule will apply.  Of course I immediately got on the phone to try to touch base with our case worker to find out if by some chance ours had been submitted, and we just hadn't heard about it yet.  She sadly told me that ours hadn't been submitted and as it is right now, we WILL in fact have to travel twice. 
I have so many thoughts, concerns and questions swarming around in my mind and heart.  The money, the stress of traveling twice, leaving our son behind until we go back again, not being able to take Isaac the first time we go etc.. etc...
God does know all of this and He is absolutely in control....I know this, and I realize that in the end of it all we WILL have our son home with us and we will be a family....but I am praying for peace for all the stresses that this news has brought on.  Our case worker has assured me that we will know more tomorrow.  I am praying that the Ethiopian government will change their minds at least for the parents that are already as far as we are in the process.  Also, I am praying that all the parents that this affects, will continue with the process and not let this discourage them from continuing with the adoption.  This makes it harder to adopt and it already is so overwhelming finacially and emotionally.  
I can't remember where the verse is found at the moment, but it keeps going through my head the past few hours...."Be still and know that I am God".......
 

I have been so proud of this handsome little man lately!  The maturity he has displayed when talking about this adoption has amazed me.  He has never been a very "expressive" child, and even when asked to do so, he has struggled with it.  This is the complete opposite of me....I find myself feeling like I need to make sure the people in my life know how I feel and that they understand me.  It has been very challenging trying to figure out how to get him to open up sometimes.  It seems like lately, he has been so affectionate and is starting to express in detail his thoughts and feelings about many different things!  I am seeing with my own eyes his growth as an individual and even more exciting, his spiritual growth!  I find myself tearing up after I hear his prayers....I no longer have to prompt him about what we should pray about or when he should pray, he is developing a true and real relationship with God that is apart from me.....this is so exciting and I am so thankful that the Lord is allowing me to see little glimpses of this in Isaac's life.  It makes me think of Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.   Every day I pray that God will enable me to be the mom and the wife that He would have me to be to my boys.  I obviously can't do it on my own, only in Him and through Him does anything turn out "right".  With all the things that go "wrong" and all the mistakes I have made, Isaac seems to be growing and learning, and becoming such a wonderful young man.  My prayer is, that through this adoption and him gaining a brother, the Lord will use this life changing experience to strengthen Isaac's character and compassion for others. 

I love him so much and I am so thankful and proud that God gave me the job of being his mom!

Recipe Resources!

One of my favorite things to do is to go to the library and get tons of magazines and cookbooks and make a menu of things from them that I am going to try out.  I was on a Rachael Ray kick for awhile, but I got bored with her stuff and now have some new favorites that I am really excited about!

My friend Shannon got me going on Tosca Reno's cookbooks...For me, they are excellent!  I LOVE all the tidbits and information, and that every recipe is so healthy!  If you are interested in cutting back on processed foods and trying to "eat cleaner" her books are a definete "must" to check out!  Isaac and I love to have muffins in the morning for breakfast, so I am always trying out new recipes for those.  I made the Applesauce Oatmeal Muffins the other day...my photo doesn't make them look quite as appetizing as the photo in her book, but I promise, they really are good.  Here is the recipe:

Ingredients:

1 cup dry old fashioned oatmeal flakes (I used oats...I am

not sure if this is what flakes are, but that is what I did)

1 cup unsweetend applesauce (This has become a staple in

my house!!  Homemade applesauce is so easy, and can be

used to sweeten SO many things!!!Love it!)

1/2 cup skim milk, soy, or almond

2 egg whites, beaten

2tbsp  ground flaxseed

2tbsp +1tsp canola oil

1tbsp baking powder

1/2 tsp baking soda

1tsp cinnamon

1/2tsp ground nutmeg

3/4 cup whole-wheat flour

1/4 cup dried cranberries

1/4 cup dried cherries

1/4 cup raisins (I added chocolate chips instead of raisins!)

I absolutely LOVE this magazine, "Cook's Country"!  It is a "new find" for me! I love the photos, the little tips and the simplicity of the recipes.  After I try more of the recipes I will post a couple.

And one of my all-time favorites is Real Simple!

I would really feel like I missed out on something

good if I didn't have that magazine each month! 

Thanks to my mom, and now Erica for the subscription gifts!  

Lastly, I have to post what I think is the best chocolate chip cookie recipe that I have tried so far.  I wanted to love the recipe that is in my Martha Stewart Cookies cookbook, but every time I made it, I was disappointed with the cookies, the texture and the taste.  I bought Ghirardelli chocolate chips one day and decided to use the recipe on the back of the bag.  I mixed half milk-chocolate and the other half bittersweet...I have also used the semi-sweet.  I have made them this way 3 times now and they have turned out just the way we love them each time!  Sorry Martha, your recipe WASN'T the best one this time! ha

Why do we adopt children?

I will admit, that yes, our very first reason for adopting was a selfish one.....we wanted another child, and a brother for our son.  I am not going to say that this reason was a wrong one, but after what God has taught us over the past 11 months, I WILL say that if this was our only goal and our only motivation, we WOULD be in the wrong, and I can assume that in the future we might end up disappointed and feeling as if there was something still missing.
We have been very fortunate to meet several people during this adoption process that have impacted our lives and our thinking greatly!  All of them for different reasons.....whether it was a positive encounter or a negative one, God has used each and every one of them to bring us to the place that we are today.  For this I am so greatful!
I can't pretend to even imagine what it is going to be like when our son is finally home with us.  We have talked about all the "what if's" over and over......we talk about the worst case scenerios and the hope for the best case scenerios too.  I realize that we really don't know exactly how we will feel when he is actually here and a part of our family, and how things will change for us.  When I hear the stories about families that have opened their hearts and homes to these children, and in return they have days filled with grief, stress and misery that they absolutely didn't expect, it makes me a little worried about our future.  Maybe worried isn't the right word, maybe just curious....because I can honestly say that I feel confident that we will be able to handle whatever the Lord brings our way as long as we rely on Him for our strength....as Paul says in Phillipians 4:13~I can do everything through him who gives me strength! 
This topic sparked a conversation between my husband and I that left me feeling thankful once again for the way God has been working in my husband's heart.  I asked Mike if he was prepared to "not like" our child, or to feel disgusted with him and not want to be around him.  This is a common thing that I am hearing many new adoptive parents struggle with lately.  He answered that he was, and that he is very aware that we have no idea what is ahead of us and that it is a risk that he is absolutely willing to take.  He then said, "Besides, I am not doing this for me, I am doing this for the Lord, and for "( our son's name )"."  He went on to say, that if this is what we know God has called us to do, we will do it to the best of our ability for Him......it isn't about us.  We both agreed that we are hoping that God blesses us with a little gem of a child :) but we also agreed that we will love him and choose to be the best parents we can to him even if he is not.  To hear Mike say these things was such a relief to me.  Mike doesn't usually like "change", especially when things are going well....and to know that God has prepared his heart in this way makes me feel like I am  going to burst with joy!  
So to go back to the title of this post,  "Why do we adopt children".....I would say that this is a good question for anyone who has adopted or is thinking of adopting, to ask themselves.  As with anything in life, if we are seeking to be fulfilled by anything but Christ or if our motivation behind something is ultimately selfish, we are going to constantly feel like something is not right or something is missing, and possibly hurt others in the process.  Only when we truly seek Him with our whole hearts will we be able to see clearly what He would have us do or be a part of.  ~Jeremiah 29:13  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
This adoption is an act of obedience to what we know God would have us do... something we can't ignore.  I am so greatful that He has given us the opportunity to do something so wonderful for Him, and that he is also blessing us with the desire of our hearts...another child, and a brother for Isaac! 

Spring is coming soon!

When I was little, if anyone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always answered, "a Mommy!"....About a year after Mike and I got married, I was so excited one morning to find out that my dream was beginning to unfold and that I was indeed going to be a mom.....shortly after this good news, the horrible events began to take place that made it evident that we were losing this sweet baby....it is such a helpless and gut wrenching feeling to experience this loss.  During the next year following this, I watched as friends got pregnant and watched their families growing while I just pleaded with the Lord for a child.  We now have an 8 year old son who is such a treasure to us and an absolute gift from God!  When he was around 2 years old we began praying that we would be able to have another child.  To make a long story short, we spent the next 3 years in and out of the doctor's offices, I was taking all different medications, getting different procedures done etc.. etc.. only to see that NEG. test each month.  My life was consumed with this and I couldn't understand why it seemed like everyone around me had so many children and some people even complained about having so many!  I finally came to a point in my life where I threw my hands up and surrendered it all to the Lord.....I had been praying and telling God that whatever His will was, I was ok with that, but I really wasn't, until this point.  I now truly had a peace about it and decided and knew that He loved me and knew the desires of my heart....God doesn't WANT us to be unhappy, so He MUST have a bigger and better plan for my life....I trusted Him and decided to just enjoy my wonderful son and husband and I was, for the first time in a long time, appreciating what God had given me, instead of wishing for more.  Don't get me wrong, the desire for more children was there, it just didn't consume me like before.  I even began to pray that if God had adoption in mind for us, that He would change Mike's heart.  I was so shocked, last May when indeed this is EXACTLY what God had in mind and what He indeed did!!  This is a whole other story that maybe I will post about another time, but I will just say, that the words coming out of my husband's mouth and the heart that he developed for adoption was an absolute work of God in his life!  It was amazing!  Now, almost one year later, we are waiting to hear when we will be traveling to pick up our son in Ethiopia!   We are told that it will definetely be this spring....this is why I posted this song.....all the words have so much depth and meaning to me because of what we have experienced and what we are about to experience.  Spring is Coming!!  It's almost here!!

Steven Curtis Chapman- Spring Is Coming (Lyrics)

Appreciating the here and now...

I have really been missing our son the past few days.....
How can I miss him when I haven't even met him yet?  I am not really sure if this is something everyone would understand.....I can't explain the feeling any other way though.
We haven't received ANY new information in the past couple of weeks.  We had been spoiled before with tons of photos and little tidbits along the way.  Now that the process is coming to the end, things have come to a waiting, stand-still it seems.  Mike calls me during the day and often when he comes home, asks if there is ANY new news....   We got so used to having something happen every day, whether it was an email, paperwork, appointments, a phone call.....it feels so strange to not have anything going on right now.
All these things are our only "connection" with him right now and I guess I am realizing that this made me feel like I was "doing something" for my son....and now, what can I do?  Just wait, and of course PRAY!
Now more than ever, he will be needing everyone's prayers!   With a  "mother's heart" I pray with so much yearning that God will protect him and give Him a peace and understanding of what is going on right now.  We pray that he has happy days and that God will prepare his heart for us as well as our hearts for him!
Which leads me to the title of this post....
These feelings and thoughts can consume your days if you let them....those of you that are or have adopted, know what I mean exactly!   I have to daily remind myself to appreciate and enjoy what I have in my life here and now....because the "here and now" truly is, very good!  God has blessed me with a very peaceful household.  There is predictability, comfort, happiness, love, security etc...  I realize that all of this could be turned upsidedown in a couple of months.  We are ready for, and excited to embark on whatever God has for our future, but we also need to remember that things will never be the same again.  So, while we wait and pray for our son all the way across the world, I will treasure each day that I have in the "here and now".

This is what was going on in my house right before, and while I was typing this post out.  All of the quietness and peace is such a gift.

My first post

I was up way too late last night trying to figure out how to get this blog set up....I think this is the reason I hesitated starting a blog in the first place. ha ha   I hope to get used to how all of this works and be able to post quickly.....It can't be that hard, SO many people have blogs and so many of them are done so well.  When you are putting your thoughts and ideas on display, you want to present everything accurately and attractively....I will get the hang of it soon I hope!

I sometimes get overwhelmed when I have so many ideas floating around in my head and so many things that I want to express.  I am so thankful that I serve a God that knows my heart!  I don't have to say it "just right" or make a impressive presentation to Him to get his attention.  I often will be in the middle of a scrambled up prayer and have to stop and tell Him, "God, you know my mind and  heart....".  Sometimes there aren't any words that can properly express what I am thinking or feeling.  This has happened more often in the last year as we have been going through this adoption process.  I feel as if my heart is going to burst with excitement, anxiety, love, anticipation, or gratitude.  I love the fact that He just knows....and that I know that He is with me through it all!

Well, along with journaling my thoughts, I want to add some fun stuff here and there that I want to keep record of or just share with all of you.  I will start today by showing you a couple of my favorite books that I have gotten, in hopes of learning as much as I can to make our son's transition to our family a smoother one. "Our First Amharic Words" is very basic but will be so useful when we are in Ethiopia...just to sit down with him and look at the pictures and learn from eachother how things are said in both of our languages.  The "Simple Amharic for Adoptive Families" has been great! !!! It comes with a cd and we are learning so much!  "Tsion's Life" is such a beautiful book.  The photos are wonderful, and it is so interesting to see the story of her every day life in Ethiopia.  I will be so interested to see what is familiar to our son and if there is anything about her life that he will say was the same for him.  I got the two books on http://www.amharickids.com/ and the cd and language book on http://www.amazon.com/.